I love (love,love) watching older, long-married couples relate and talk about how they “beat the odds” and created a successful, long-term marriage.

I found this cute video of an older couple talking about their marriage…and the secrets to their happiness.

It was, apparently, a project for a teen Bible study.

Enjoy and have a great weekend!

Posted: September 28th, 2007 under Christian Marriage.
Comments: none

There has been an interesting thread on our marriage forums that deals with “married dating.”

A few participants felt that taking time away from children for a “date” was selfish and wrong.

I disagree wholeheartedly. The best way to ensure a proper environment for children is to give them a safe, secure and happy marriage within which to live. To do that, it is NECESSARY that parents nurture their relationship…and “dating” is one of the ways in which you do that.

One of our forum members posted the following and I liked it so much I thought I would re-post it here for you. You can find the entire thread here.

I had a pastor in church once asked the congregation to answer one question. Second to the lord, who or what was most important in our lives. The majority of the congregation voiced the words “children”. The pastor began to explain how wrong all of us were to be putting our children’s importance above that of our spouses.

Before children came along, who was there? Your spouse. When the children were there, who was there? Your spouse. Once your children are grown and gone away, who will be there? Your spouse. Have you ever stopped to think…Have you ever seen a family were the husband and wife are as happy as they can be and the children are miserable and uncared for? Most likely not.

The fact is, our #1 concern in our families should be our spouses. If mom and dad are happy the kids will be taken care of. When the one parent neglects their spouse for sake of the children, that’s when problems begin. I just recently purchased a brand new vehicle for my wife. It only had 6 miles on it. It also has a DVD player with wireless headsets. How could something simple be so important? Well, I’ll tell you. When the children put the headsets on, they are in their own little world. That, in turn puts my wife and I in our own world. We can talk about why she had a bad week at the office or where I might have to travel next, or whatever. The point is, no matter how you do it; you have to MAKE time to bond your relationship with your spouse. Because that is the person you want to spend the rest of you life with.

Remember when you Dated, how you would talk about absolutely nothing but you were talking. What you were really doing is bonding. If you don’t continue to talk and bond, you will come apart. If you put enough stress and every day life on super glue, it will come apart. But if you put a little glue in the cracks every once in a while, the pieces will stick together better.

Do I have disagreements with my wife? Sure I do. Do I get frustrated at my kids because they won’t listen? Sure I do. Have I ever disciplined one child when it was actually the second child that made the mess? Sure I have. Have I ever swallowed my pride and dropped to my knees to apologize to them for being wrong? Almost daily!

No one is perfect. We just have to put priorities in place. If you make the big priorities (mom and dad) first. Then the little priorities (our kids) will fall into place. It has to, that’s the way God designed it.

Posted: September 27th, 2007 under Christian Marriage, Christian Romance.
Comments: 1

Another funny clip from Christian comedian Mark Gungor on the differences between men and women when it comes to sex…

Posted: September 26th, 2007 under Christian Marriage.
Comments: none

Comedian Mark Gungor draws a scientifically proven graph of the male drive…

Posted: September 25th, 2007 under Male Sexuality.
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It’s Monday morning.

Of course, the number one question that is on all of your minds is…

What is the average penis size?

Don’t wonder any longer. About.com has posted an article on average penis size.

Posted: September 24th, 2007 under Male Sexuality.
Comments: none

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.-Ephesians 4:32For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more.-Hebrews 8:12

Yesterday’s post was about re-kindling your dreams, desires and expectations about your Christian marriage.

One of the biggest obstacles to changing directions and believing that we can change things, in our marriage or in our life in general, is overcoming the glaring fact that we (and our spouses) have failed so many times in the past…

God tells us that we need to forgive and forget because He has.

Below is a video for the Audio Adrenaline song, “Ocean Floor.”

Lyrics…

The mistakes I’ve made
That caused pain
I could have done without
All my selfish thought
All my pride
The things I hide
You have forgot about
They’re all behind you
They’ll never find you
They’re on the ocean floor
Your sins are forgotten
They’re on the bottom
Of the ocean floor
My misdeeds
All my greed
All the things that haunt me now
They’re not a pretty sight to see
But they’re wiped away
By a mighty, mighty wave
A mighty, mighty wave
Your sins are erased
And they are no more
They’re out on the ocean floor
Take them away
To return no more
Take them away
To the ocean floor

Enjoy the video and start your weekend off by “forgiving and forgetting” yourself and your spouse.

Posted: September 21st, 2007 under Christian Marriage.
Comments: none

The Christian life is a constant struggle between what “is” and “what can be.”

In fact, in many ways, the definition of our earthly existence is the working out of this tension between (perceived) reality and true potential.

This applies even more so to our approach to our marriages.

I love the analogy that marriage is a “crucible” in which we refine and distill our character and relationship to God…through the reaching to make our marital relationship move from “what it is” to “what it can be.”

But, too many times, we allow “reality” to discourage and paralyze us. Instead of relying on faith that we can move towards something more ideal, we focus on the “seen.”

Most likely, neither you nor your spouse are super models; the march of time has taken its toll.

And, many of your “real” day-to-day interactions more resemble Al and Peggy Bundy than they do the lovers depicted in the Song of Solomon.

You and your spouse have a history of disappointing each other equal to the history of fulfilling their needs and wishes.

So, do we give up on the romantic ideals and expectations that we had when we decided to marry?

Do we make the (usually) wrong assumption that “someone else” would be the answer to fulfilling our romantic dreams?

Or…

Do we make the conscious decision to remember our dreams and expectations and have the faith and fortitude to start moving towards them again?

I hope, for you, that you decide to do the latter.

And, the starting point, many times, in making progress is to “remember” what your dreams and ideals and expectations were.

Instead of hiding our eyes from our past dreams, we need to open them wide…drink in the emotions and colors and adrenaline that rushes over us when we allow ourselves to “remember.”

The video below is a slide show put together with the musical piece, “This Marriage,” by Eric Whitacre, a contemporary composer.

It is part of a greater work based on Milton’s classic work, Paradise Lost.

In this piece, Whitacre is re-creating the anticipation and dreams and desires of a young couple on their wedding day…and their prayers to God to fulfill these dreams and desires for their relationship. It is all about that naive, youthful belief that your life (and your) relationship will be THE ideal type. It is about that time before a couple has to integrate these dreams and desires with reality.

But, I would suggest that this “naive” belief is no less valid than any of our cynical, “realistic” views after running head on into life’s realities.

In fact, as a people of faith, it is MORE valid than accepting “reality.”

I am posting it because I think it can be (for some of you) a starting point…a “spark” that re-ignites that flame…that helps you to “remember” what you once hoped and wished for.

Once you have done that…you have the chance to start moving in the right direction again.

The lyrics…

May these vows and this marriage be blessed.
May it be sweet milk,
this marriage, like wine and halvah.
May this marriage offer fruit and shade
like the date palm.

May this marriage be full of laughter,
our every day a day in paradise.
May this marriage be a sign of compassion,
a seal of happiness here and hereafter.

May this marriage have a fair face and a good name,
an omen as welcomes the moon in a clear blue sky.

I am out of words to describe
how spirit mingles in this marriage.

Posted: September 20th, 2007 under Christian Marriage, Christian Romance.
Comments: none

According to a recent Associated Press report, seniors are having sex well into their eighties.

A few excerpts…

An unprecedented study of sex and seniors finds that many older people are surprisingly frisky - willing to do, and talk about, intimate acts that would make their grandchildren blush. That may be too much information for some folks, but it comes from the most comprehensive sex survey ever done among 57- to 85-year-olds in the United States.

Sex and interest in it do fall off when people are in their 70s, but more than a quarter of those up to age 85 reported having sex in the previous year. And the drop-off has a lot to do with health or lack of a partner, especially for women, the survey found.

_Sex with a partner in the previous year was reported by 73 percent of people ages 57 to 64; 53 percent of those ages 64 to 75, and 26 percent of people 75 to 85. Of those who were active, most said they did it two to three times a month or more.

_Women at all ages were less likely to be sexually active than men. But they also lacked partners; far more were widowed.

_People whose health was excellent or very good were nearly twice as likely to be sexually active as those in poor or fair health.

_Half of people having sex reported at least one related problem. Most common in men was erection trouble (37 percent); in women, low desire (43 percent), vaginal dryness (39 percent) and inability to have an orgasm (34 percent).

_One out of seven men used Viagra or other substances to improve sex.

_Only 22 percent of women and 38 percent of men had discussed sex with a doctor since age 50.

The survey had a remarkable 75 percent response rate. Only 2 percent to 7 percent did not answer questions about sexual activities or problems, although a higher percentage declined to reveal how often they masturbate.

Posted: September 18th, 2007 under sex and seniors.
Comments: none

About.com has a helpful section that illustrates various sexual positions in a non-pornographic manner; it uses wooden modeling figures.

If you are interested in finding new positions, yet are concerned about pornography, you should check it out at sex positions.

Posted: September 17th, 2007 under Sex Positions.
Comments: none

Thousands of Christian men have learned how to please their wives in bed through our books Sexual Skills For The Christian Husband and Sexual Satisfaction For The Christian Wife.

But, one question persists…

“What else can I do to make my wife more interested in sex?”

The video below offers some useful suggestions.

Enjoy and have a great weekend.

Posted: September 14th, 2007 under Christian Sex, Christian Sex Advice, Christian Marriage, Christian Sex Videos, increase female sex drive, married sex.
Comments: 4